Kéïta Fournier-Pelletier - Creative Process Blog

“Pillar of You” is one of the rare instances in my creative work where the title came first. A couple years ago, my friends and I were pulling tarot cards and we were playing this game where we would try to interpret what the cards represented to us based on the imagery before reading the descriptions from the booklet. Someone pulled a card with an image of a person sitting with their back against a stack of spheres that were the colours of the rainbow. The spheres were positioned vertically behind them, like a pillar. We talked about how this felt like a representation of one’s queerness – how it's a part of who you are that supports you through life. “It’s like a Pillar of You”, someone said. I loved the way those words sounded together, so we wrote it on a scrap of paper and stuck it to our fridge, where it still is to this day. 

A small, coffee stained piece of paper with the words “Pillar of You” written on it, and a smiley face underneath. The paper is stuck on a refrigerator, with a clear circular magnet at the bottom left corner, and a red mushroom magnet at the top right corner.

This process was unique because it was the first time I created something around a concept, rather than movement/images already in my mind. I came into this process with no choreography set, I only knew I wanted to create something queer. Receiving an Open Space residency from the National Ballet’s CreativAction program in November 2022, was a catalyst for this piece. The cast consists not only of dancers I admire, but also friends I felt comfortable with, who are also queer. Our first rehearsal started with each cast member journaling around the question; What are the pillars of who you are? This was the base for everything we created in Pillar of You. 

Through a lot of journal prompts, writing (& rewriting), discussions and movement exploration this work came to be. The process for Pillar of You was highly collaborative, as I wanted to explore common themes in our collective experiences as queer, gender nonconforming people, yet still show the diverse and individual stories found within each cast member. This work has become something so vulnerable, intimate and tender in a way I never could have imagined because of everyone’s contributions.

Reflecting on the pillars of who I am, I realize how important my queerness has become to my life. As someone who discovered I was queer as an adult, I wonder how much it affected my childhood subconsciously. My queerness has led me to and continues to contribute to so many meaningful friendships, and the love, community and family I have in my life today. I went into this process thinking I wanted to explore themes of “deviance”, as it is often attached to queer people, as an identity not always accepted by the larger society. However, I have come to realize that my queer deviance isn’t the facet of my queerness that has made me the person I am today. It is my memories, experiences and values that I have carried from childhood, and accumulated as an adult. 

When I reflect on what Pillar of You has become, the anecdote about its title feels so fitting. It came from a memory shared with friends and that is exactly what the creative process was like: time spent with close friends making cherished memories. 

Pillar of You made its debut in Toronto, November 2023, at Citadel + Compagnie’s mixed bill, Citadel Dance Mix. The warmth, praise and support this work was met with was an overwhelming amount. 

I am truly grateful for all of those who contributed to the work. Thank you to all the cast members, Morgyn Aronyk-Schell, Arin Aronyk-Schell, Tavia Christina, Barbara Simms, and Kiah Francis. Thank you to my Outside Eye, Eilish Shin-Culhane for helping me stay sane, and making sure the work lived up to its full potential. Thank you to all community members who participated in our community discussions partnered with OVERSIZE.LOAD (@oversize.load). Thank you to the friends, family, & strangers who supported the GoFundMe created for our Open Space residency, and the National Ballet for granting said residency. Thank you to Laurence Lemieux & the Citadel + Compagnie team for the opportunity to premiere this work at CDM, for believing in my work, for the studio space, the production team, and the list goes on. Thank you to my partner, friends and family, past & present, who have made me who I am today. Thank you to all who have supported me and this work. Finally, thank you to Aeris Körper for this opportunity, I cannot wait to share this work with you all in Hamilton! 

Merci, marsii & miigwetch!

xx 

Kéïta

A compilation of moments from Pillar of You, filmed during rehearsals. The movement is soft and careful. The video ends with three dancers hugging at the end of a sequence.

Music: first light by shn shn (Shanika Maria)
Videography: Juliette Coleman
Edited by: Kéïta Fournier-Pelletier

Come see Pillar of You at Here&Now, happening March 20th-22nd at the Art Gallery of Hamilton!

Subsidized tickets always available upon request. Click here to fill out a form.